To Be Myself

I started reading Tarot and Oracle cards five years ago, but fell out of the habit when my adventures with homelessness started. A couple weeks ago I decided to get back into the habit and started doing daily readings for myself, though honestly I had a hard time coming up with questions to ask. Today, in a blur of thoughts and frustrations, I felt inspired to ask the cards, “What is my life purpose? What should I be putting my energy into?”

And the answer? Be yourself, unafraid and uninhibited.

It sounds easy, but it’s not.

When I was little, my most favoritest color ever was bright golden yellow. Then one day, someone told me that yellow was the color of cowards, and I was so embarrassed of myself that I immediately changed my favorite color — boldly standing up for myself and what I like is not something that has come naturally for me. In fact, I’ve spent most of my life trying to water myself down so that I appear more like everyone else.

So, I guess that the Universe has spoken, and I know what I need to do now. The idea terrifies me, and yet I find it to be exciting and liberating as well. I have been given permission to be myself without fear!

And yellow IS a very beautiful color!


2 thoughts on “To Be Myself

  1. Yellow represents life-giving sunshine, happiness and joy which your child’s mind was fully in touch with. Children are intuitively intelligent about these things, because they are innocent and untouched by the world (nearer to heaven). “Be not afraid” is a courageous way to live your life.

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